Beyond Bulimia

I’d like someone to define normal for me please.  The dictionary can’t do it.  They actually give you twelve different definitions which all sound something like “conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal”. 

Now maybe its just me but it seems like it should be against the rules to use a words antonym to define the word itself.

Well whatever the definition it doesn’t apply to my relationship with food.  I can’t seem to figure out how to eat slower.  I’ve tried chewing my food a certain number of times which doesn’t work because all foods don’t need to be chewed 25 times and some foods that I tend to over cook like chicken need to be chewed more than that.  I’ve tried setting my fork down in between bites but then I worry about leaving my fork down for to long. Counting makes me feel like a moron, I mean seriously who counts the seconds that they leave their fork down? Taking a sip in between each bite just seems stupid because I’m not necessarily thirsty after every bite of food that I take.  I worry about my little tricks to try to eat at a normal pace becoming obsessive or abnormal.

THIS IS NOT NORMAL!

Although maybe its normal for me…