Beyond Bulimia

They call bulimia an addiction, at least they treat it like one.  12 step program and all.  Now I have nothing against the 12 step program, its world wide and its helped thousands and thousands of people but I don’t know if bulimia should be treated like that.  Alcoholics can rid their houses of alcohol.  Drug addicts don’t have to have their drug of choice sitting in the cabinets.  Bulimics can’t run away from food, its constantly there staring you in the face.  And sometimes food is your enemy.Food’s been my enemy for a long time.  We have a love hate relationship.  I love food, it loves my hips, and I hate that.  And my enemy has come back to stare me in the face hard core.  I know I have to eat but I don’t want to eat.  And I love to eat. Ok so yea the binge purge cycle is addicting! It’s so addicting…sometimes I miss it.  It’s really weird but it was a comfort.  Yea I admit its a disgusting habit but it’s still….it’s still enjoyable.  I don’t like saying that I miss it, but if I don’t admit that I miss it it makes the idea of starting again and keeping it a secret alluring.